We made it...

Charlie and I just survived his first full-fledged, no holds barred tantrum.  I thought we'd had tantrums in the past, but they were nothing compared to this one -- and we made it.

It technically started when Charlie helped himself to some cheese crackers from the pantry after finishing his afternoon snack of jell-o and cheese.  Charlie knows full well that our pantry is not self-service, and I was fairly convinced that he was not starving, so I said no, took the crackers away and told him to stay out of the pantry.  That's when the screaming started. 

Realistically, though, I think the crux of the problem lies in the big transition.  Charlie is in the process of moving up from the Toddler class to the Younger Twos at school -- and he's not too happy about it.  Yesterday he started sobbing uncontrollably when Miss Brenda took him out to play with the big kids, and today he just wasn't himself. 

I have to admit that I thought I would be the one to struggle with this transition -- after all, I'm not ready for him to turn two, and Charlie knows all the kids in the Younger Twos and usually loves new adventures.  I was wrong.  I don't know if it's the bigger room, the different teachers, the regular trips to the potty or just a vague understanding that he is no longer going to spend his mornings with Miss Jo-Jo and Miss Amanda and his afternoons with Miss Brenda and Miss Janet, but he is definitely out of sorts. 

His confusion and anxiety are breaking my heart, but I guess all we can do is power through.  After all, I don't think the directors are going to agree to Charlie staying in the Toddler room indefinitely, nor can I imagine that they'd move his four teachers up just for him -- though a few more days like this and I might be tempted to ask...

Anyway, I am fairly sure that Charlie said "I want crackers" more times in the past 20 minutes than I have said in my entire life -- and I am certain that he said it louder and more shrill-ly than I ever have.  Screaming, sobbing, whimpering, thrashing, begging, swatting...we had all of it.  "I want crackers" briefly switched to "I want jeans on" (no idea where that came from), but quickly switched back. 

Determined not to give in and reward Charlie for his tantrum, I sat with him on the time out bench, moved with him to the recliner, turned on Big Bird and quickly turned it back of upon Charlie's demand.  Basically, for 20 minutes I just sat there and held a screaming toddler -- and it worked. 

Finally, his cries died down and when he asked for crackers I told him that he could have a banana or milk.  He asked for white cheese instead, and I compromised -- once he'd said "May I have white cheese, please."

I'm not convinced that I won this battle, since he still ended up with food.  But I know I didn't lose, since the crying stopped and no one's had any crackers -- plus, maybe he really was hungry and at least he ended up with something healthy.  What's more, right now he's happily shouting "Daddy's here" while slithering out of his highchair buckle.

Now I know what a a real tantrum is, and I just pray I'll be strong enough to make it through the next one, assuming we make it through transition week in the first place...