I think a lot of those absolutes come from a few misconceptions: 1 - A failure to realize that you will be running behind for the rest of your life, 2 - An underestimation of just how cute (aka manipulative) small children can be and 3 - A lack of understanding of just how much fun it is to make your child smile and how hard it is to let him cry.
Nevertheless, Jason and I have managed to maintain at least a slight hold on some of our pre-Charlie resolutions. Among them: we eat dinner together as a family at least 90% of the time, we follow through on threats, even if it means leaving a restaurant mid-meal and we limit the amount of presents/gifts/rewards/prizes that Charlie receives.
Amazingly, the last one is probably the hardest -- it is just so much fun to see Charlie's little face light up when we give him something new and even more fun to pick out neat things that we think he'll enjoy. What's even more amazing is that despite the fact that our various locations require them to grandparent from afar, Jason's and my parents cooperate fully with our wishes. Obviously, Christmas and birthdays bring some serious (but well-considered) gifts, but we don't have to worry about packages arriving on a weekly basis, and figuring when/if to give them to him.
Clearly this "stinginess" (as I'm sure he'll see it when he's about 10 -- I certainly did as a child) ensures that Charlie gets a lot more use out of his current toys, but what's more, it is developing within him a huge appreciation for random presents when they do arrive.
Just yesterday, a box full of camping gear arrived from Grandma and Grandpa to accessorize the teepee Grandma made for Charlie's birthday. From the moment I told Charlie there was a package on the porch, through the wait for Daddy to get home to open it, he was an excited mess. Then when he and Jason got to tear into the boxes and assemble all his gear, Charlie was absolutely beside himself. He's been cooking pancakes and coffee on his camp stove and bringing us into the powder room with his lantern ever since.
His joy and appreciation of the gifts from Grandma and Grandpa are such a blessing to us, and I definitely think that our "hard line" contributes to the excitement. I would absolutely love for Charlie to grow up feeling truly grateful each time that he receives a gift from someone -- to value the generosity and the love that comes with it, to cherish the element of surprise and of course, to just adore the fact that he has a present to open!
How do you want your pancakes?
I did it!
Coffee?
