Wheeeere's Charlie?

The past few days have been like an endless game of peek-a-boo.  We've had glimpses of our sweet Charlie, but mostly we've been faced with an angry imposter...but let me start at the beginning.

Our trip to San Diego went very well.  In fact, Charlie behaved better on the flights than we ever could have dreamed, despite the fact that on the way out we woke him up at 4 AM to catch a 3+ hour flight at 6 AM, and on the way home, after 8+ hours of traveling, we were diverted to Charlotte where we sat on the runway for over an hour in the midst of a thunderstorm complete with high winds and hail...delaying our arrival in Charleston by three hours. 

Through all of this, Charlie was a champ.  He slept at least an hour per flight and almost 3 hours on the long flights each way, and while he was awake he played happily with his crayons and empty cups or flirted with the other passengers.

On top of these triumphs, Charlie had a great time with his cousins, aunts, uncles and BaBa and PaPa in San Diego.  While he didn't adjust to the time change until the day before we came home, he was perfectly willing to patrol the resort grounds in his stroller from 4 AM to 6 AM each day while Daddy, BaBa and PaPa slept in the room.  We had a great time exploring, eating raisins and chatting with the birds, capped off every morning with the glorious, highly-anticipated opening of the coffee cart, or as Charlie puts it "Caca".

Despite these lengthy stroller stretches in the morning, Charlie also did a great job at Legoland and Sea World.  While he definitely preferred to be out roaming the parks with his cousins, running, climbing, building, driving, splashing, etc, he put up with a lot more stroller time, too.  As a reward Charlie got his first set of duplos, which he valued to the point of locking them in the hotel safe, requiring a visit from hotel security to free them.

Then on Thursday we all loaded into the minivans and took a roadtrip up to Los Angeles where Jason, Charlie and I cavorted in a park just off Rodeo Drive while the rest of the family did a bit of shopping -- after almost 6 hours in the car, we decided not to try our luck in the shops. 

We followed this with a fabulous dinner at Moon Shadows in Malibu with Aunt Monica, where we had the most "California" waiter you can imagine.  He looked exactly like Frank Sinatra in Guys and Dolls and was throwing out surfer lingo and hand signals right and left.  Aunt Erin, Uncle Matt and I enjoyed the show thoroughly -- while Charlie napped blissfully in the corner.

Unfortunately, it was during the drive back to San Diego that the tides turned and "imposter Charlie" showed up.  About 30 minutes from the hotel he woke up screaming and wouldn't stop.  Jason and I were doing everything we could: singing, cuddling, promising, begging, praying, stroking, bribing, but to no avail.  He didn't calm down until we arrived back at the hotel after midnight.  Then he passed a rough night in the pack n play until we woke him up around 5:30 -- not a good start to 12+ hours of traveling, but as I said before, he was a trouper.

"Imposter Charlie" did rear his head a couple times through the week and on the flights home, when Charlie developed a new love for hitting, biting and pinching, but each time he would try it we would just correct him and he would stop fairly quickly.  We were convinced that he didn't even know he was hurting us when upon Jason's recommendation I returned pinch for pinch, and Charlie was completely surprised -- and hasn't pinched since.  How wrong we were though...

Rather than rehash the gory details, I'll just say that Saturday and Sunday were characterized by screams, pouts, smacks, bites, tears and one particularly memorable headbutt -- all by Charlie, other than the tears which I believe were shed all around.  It was as I was watching Charlie laugh at the tears streaming down my face after he headbutted me hard enough to give me a fat lip that I realized it is possible to dislike your own child.  

It was a very scary moment for me.  I have a pretty in-depth theory on like vs. love, but to sum it up, I basically believe that "loving" is a choice we make, whereas "liking" is a reaction we have.  To be clear, I never waivered in my love for the little monster, but I cannot honestly say that I liked the brown eyes laughing into mine.

Jason was actually out helping some church friends on a special project yesterday evening, so the return of "sweet Charlie" for dinner, bath and bedtime was an overwhelming relief.  I'm not sure I could have handled 2 hours of "imposter Charlie" on my own.

Of course, there was a downside to Jason being away.  Basically, I cannot be trusted alone with a channel changer and spent the evening watching the Discovery Health Channel, which was highlighting children with Bipolar Disorder and Schizophrenia.  While even I am not ridiculous enough to think that Charlie was showing signs of Schizophrenia, a lot of the symptoms discussed on the Bipolar show hit a little close to home -- to the point that by the time Jason got home, I felt compelled to discuss the possibility that Charlie was showing the first signs of the disorder.  Needless to say, I believe Jason may be blocking that channel in the future...

Despite his confidence that "sweet Charlie" hadn't been permanently replaced by "imposter Charlie," even Jason was a little nervous to send Charlie to daycare today.  Yesterday morning in the church nursery he actually pulled a sweet little girl's hair, so we were somewhat expecting a call to come get him quite early today.  But much to our surprise and delight, this morning everything seemed to be back to normal.  Charlie seemed thrilled to be back on his normal schedule, waking up on time, eating his breakfast and playing in the living room, and he was excited to see Miss Jo-Jo and Miss Amanda at school. 

All in all, this morning went off without even a glimpse of "imposter Charlie".  And, as it's almost 2:30 in the afternoon and we haven't heard from school, I am hopeful that all of the drama and mayhem of this particular game of peek-a-boo are behind us, and our "sweet Charlie" is back to stay.  I sure hope so...

Jamming with Daddy on the first flight

Pro-traveler

Bliss!

Motorboat with PaPa and Cousins!

Pre-dawn wandering

Coffee Cart is open & has "Na-nas"

Heads of the table

Chuga-chuga

Loving the Legos

Maximizing the Daddy Time

Bob who?

The Killer Whale Show

Starfish are way more exciting

Zoom-zoom

Ready to swim

Fun with cousins

Whee!

Happy Family

Tackling the Tree

Art Appreciation in Beverly Hills

Big Boy Bonanza

Ask and you shall receive!  I said that Charlie needed a big brother and tah-dah: a week full of water-related fun with big boys and one very special little girl!

The fun started on Saturday when Sophia came over for some water table and popsicle adventures.  I can't imagine a better way to beat the heat -- especially since Megan and I got to sit in the shade and chat while they got sticky and soaked. 

We followed that up with an outrageous amount of fun learning how to water Bob's driveway.  Bob was high up on the hero list before, but I believe Charlie is officially a landscaping apprentice to his dear "Bob-o" now!

Then on Sunday we met Calvin (and his parents) at Sullivan's Island for some serious digging and getting dirty.  Jason and I learned that a very deep hole and an umbrella are the perfect setup at the beach.  Charlie and Calvin were entranced and corralled, so we adults got to sit around and enjoy the sun and waves!

But that's not all! (marketing speak, for please keep paying attention!)  My college roommate, Susanna, her husband Jeremy and their two sons arrived in Charleston on Sunday evening for vacation.  Due to completely unreliable forecasts, we cancelled a boat ride on Tuesday night for a picnic dinner up here at home.  Charlie just adored following George around and "playing" fooz-ball with Clark.  Luckily, we ignored the forecasts on Thursday and took our chances on the boatride.  Charlie and George had a ball squealing in the front of the boat and urging Captain George to go faster, faster, faster!

I truly couldn't have scripted a better week for my baby boy dying for a big brother.  Amazingly enough, it's going to get even better.  Tomorrow we board a plane for San Diego where Charlie will get to spend an entire week with his big boy cousin, Tyler, along with all of his big girl cousins, Alexis, Mallory, Ellie and Elizabeth.  And he'll get to be the the big boy cousin to Landon. 

I have a feeling mom and dad are going to seem pretty boring come mid-August -- but then Grandma comes to town for some serious spoiling.  What a summer!

Splish-Splash

Whoa!

Oh...I get it...

Calvin making us all soup for lunch

Captain Clark

Tour Guide George

Zoom-zoom

Our rainbow to bless the evening

Only Child Blues

I am convinced that there is nothing Charlie loves more than being "one of the boys".  He had the time of his life last weekend with Caleb, Logan and Will Daniels.  I bet they hadn't been here 5 minutes before he grabbed Will's arm and pulled him to the toys, and he would have been happy to just follow Caleb and Logan around for hours.

Bottom line, Charlie wants a big brother.  Jason and I still have hopes of making him into a big brother someday, but I truly believe that he would prefer having one to being one.  Big kids are just the best thing ever to him. 

Apparently, I went on and on about my new theory Sunday and Monday, because Monday evening Jason told me in no uncertain terms that we will not be adopting a big brother for Charlie.  And as much as I would like to say it had never crossed my mind...it had.  And while I would also like to say that my thoughts were focued on providing a safe, loving home to a child who needs one...they weren't.  Charlie loved having a big kid around, so my instinct was to go out and get him one.  Crazy, but true.

Nonetheless, the Daniels' visit was a pure pleasure from start to finish, and we were all sorry to see them go on Monday morning.  Charlie took it a bit harder than Jason or I did, and was a bit of a pickle Monday night.  Of course, it could also have had something to do with the fact that he was coming down with a stomach bug that sent him home from school Tuesday and sidelined both him and Jason all day Wednesday, but Charlie was definitely acting a little bit big for his britches Monday evening. 

From insisting on no clothes, to throwing a fit when forced to drink out of a sippy cup rather  than mom's glass, to having the nerve to enjoy time out, he was a handful.  Tuesday night and Wednesday he was downright docile, due to his fever, tummy ache, and sore bottom, so much so in fact that I was almost relieved to have him running around like a maniac again this morning...almost.

Caleb Fishing with the Big Boys

Will ready to hit the waves

Logan chilling at the beach

Living it up during Time Out

Back to Himself

Perfect?

Ok...this post isn't really Charlie-based, but I had to share my "a-ha moment" from last night.  As I was washing my hands, I looked in the mirror and had a vivid flashback to one morning when I was about 11 or 12 years old. 

I was in my Heather Blue (still my favorite bedroom color ever) bedroom, lolling about in my twin bed on my fabulous pink and white pin-dot striped Laura Ashley sheets.  Having been your typical pre-teen, I was mopey and grouchy.  I remember laying there wishing that just about everything about me was different.  I wished that I had unpermed, bangless hair, didn't need glasses, was 20 pounds thinner, had clear skin and was in love.

Flash forward 20+ years and...
 - I have straight, bangless hair (though "uncurly" might be a more accurate term in Lowcountry humidity)
 - I am still giddy about 8 years of 20/10 vision thanks to Lasik surgery
 - I am about 10 pounds thinner, but at 20 years older, I'm perfectly satisfied with that
 - Pimples are few and far between
 - I am head over heels in love with my husband and my perfect baby boy

For a couple seconds I was in complete awe.  Every wish I had made that morning so long ago had come true -- even the vane, superficial ones...  The realization made me smile and I immediately noticed that while all of the physical wishes of my pre-teen self have come true, I now have wrinkles.  Hah! 

So while I started down the path of thinking that all of our dreams do come true given enough patience, time, prayer, etc, blah-blah-blah...what I really realized is that God has a terrific sense of humor to go along with His perfect plan.  Maybe that and the fulfillment of that last wish are what keep 33 year old Jenny from dwelling on the wrinkles the way 13 year old Jenny did on everything else.  I can only imagine what I'm going to see in the mirror in another 20 years!

Vulnerable

It is so frustrating that one incident can ruin a whole weekend! 

We had an absolutely fabulous time with Brent, Christa and family Saturday morning when they came to brunch.  Then after they left, we had a whole day ahead of us with no plans!  After Charlie's nap, we headed into town where Jason and Charlie both got haircuts, and Charlie had his first and second lollipops!  He is a huge fan of Mango Dum-Dums (did they even have Mango when we were kids??).

Racing around Target in the cart and chicken nuggets and icecream cones at Chick-Fil-A were topped by a trip to Lowe's.  All I can say is that Charlie is just like his Daddy.  He had an absolute blast running through Lowe's, high-fiving and fist-bumping the employees and flirting with a 5 year old girl in the checkout line.  We might have to see if Lowe's hosts birthday parties!

We closed out the day with a run through the sprinkler and some splashing around in Charlie's new water table...perfect for a hot Saturday afternoon.

Sunday was great, too.  I got to work in the nursery at church and watch Charlie play with all his little friends -- once he finally decided that the room was sufficiently vacuumed.  Then we all went down to check on the boat and play at Mt Pleasant Waterfront Park -- followed by more icecream. 

It was just a perfectly relaxing and enjoyable weekend, during which we learned some invaluable life lessons:

1 - We don't put food in our mouth while we're coughing

2 - Mom and Dad really can ignore 16 miles of worn out screaming

3 - Otis likes icecream, too

4 - Daddy only has 2 handles and those are his hands. NOTHING else on Daddy is a handle.

5 - Yelling makes you run faster.

And unfortunately,

6 - We're not necessarily safe in our own backyard

Jason came up to bed at 11:00 last night and looked out our bedroom window to see someone rooting around in his truck!  He grabbed the keys to set off the alarm, but accidentally started it -- serves the thief right!  The police came and took a report, and luckily nothing was stolen.  The creeps must have made their move when they saw the light go off. Thank goodness they weren't smart enough to wait longer! 

The crazy part is that Jason's truck was literally 4 feet from the corner of our house and it was only 11:00 at night.  We're pretty sure that it was just some bratty kids, but that doesn't really make me feel any safer.  Looks like Jason won't be going on any overnight trips anytime soon...

Post-brunch photo-op

Like father like son!

I'll take one of these, two of those...

Can't catch me!

Woohoo!

You mean I'm allowed to do this?!?!

Following in Daddy's Flip-Flops

Long Distance Love

What a week!  Over the past 8 days Charlie has said goodbye to some of his first dear friends and has deepened relationships with some of his family.  It's definitely been a week of ups and downs.

Unfortunately, we've had to bid farewell to two of Charlie's Angels.  Lakely and Kate (and their respective parents) are both leaving Summerville for opportunities and adventures elsewhere.  We are thrilled for both families, but selfishly, we are very sad to see them go.  To make sure they all knew how much they would be missed, we had a neighborhood Shrimp Boil last Thursday night to celebrate friendship and new opportunities.  It was such fun!

On the heels of the celebration, Charlie's great Uncle Brent, Great Aunt Christa and cousins Stephen, Ryan and Katie arrived on IOP for their summer vacation.  Then two days later Uncle Matt, Aunt Erin, cousins Tyler and Elizabeth and the whole Haggerty clan drove up from their vacation on Hilton Head, so we've had a wonderful week of eating, laughing, boating, eating, digging, sunning and more eating. 

Charlie is quite smitten with Elizabeth & Katie, has a serious case of hero-worship for Tyler, Stephen, Ryan, and has quite possibly found his soul mate in Uncle Brent.  Obviously, we would have enjoyed our visitors no matter when they came to town, but the timing couldn't have been better.  We needed the reminder that relationships can still flourish with family and friends regardless of where we live -- and while a week here and there doesn't replace living in the same town, it does provide the opportunity focus all of our energy on enjoying each other. 

And it gets even better!  The Daniels arrive a week from today, the Freemans a week later and then we head to San Diego to meet up with BaBa, PaPa and the whole family for the first week of August!  Charlie isn't going to know what hit him!

Mmmm....

Charlie's turn at Corn Hole

Looks like Kate's winning...

The Ladies of Reminisce

Uncle Brent,  Aunt Christa, Stephen, Katie and Ryan on IOP

Ready for the Fireworks

Hmmmm...not quite as exciting as he'd expected

Captain Tyler and his First Mate

Cruising with Cousin Elizabeth

Fist Bump

Cheers, Uncle Brent!

Bad "Advice"

Today I digress a bit from my Charlie focus, but it has to be done.  Judgment, disguised as good-natured "advice," is driving me crazy.  I am sick and tired of friends, family members and strangers feeling not only the desire, but also the right to attack the choices made by other moms.

I have a number of mom friends who are experiencing major transitions in their lives right now:  moves, promotions, quitting work to stay home, expecting second children, etc.  Fortunately, most if not all of them are excited about their opportunities, but as with any significant change, there is stress involved.  What amazes me is that almost all of them have been the recipients of judgmental and even spiteful "advice" from people they trust.

The decision to work outside the home or to be a stay at home mom is a huge one for most families.  Even those of us who are financially dependent on two incomes put in hours, if not days or weeks of thought and analysis regarding whether or not to go back to work, continue working or stay at home.  No one that I know has made this decision lightly or without some misgivings.

So why is it that other people feel free to judge our decisions based on their personal situations, lifestyles, values and opinions?  Why is it that anyone ranging from a  close relative to a complete stranger feels that he or she has the right to tell us what is best for our children?

Due to my unusual work arrangement, I fall on both sides of the "stay at home" vs. "go to work" argument.  I am home all day, but Charlie goes to daycare for about 6 to 7 hours so I can do my work and keep my job.  Jason and I are incredibly grateful for our situation, because I am well paid for a job that is easily handled between 8 and 5, requires minimal travel and has virtually no stress.  Plus, if I get my daily work done in less than 8 hours, I can go get Charlie early -- and he's only 7 minutes away. 

Despite our satisfaction with our circumstances, Jason and I have been faced with outright and veiled judgment from both ends of the spectrum.  Explaining to coworkers why I not only accepted, but campaigned for a significant pay cut and relative free-fall down the corporate ladder is like explaining the theory of relativity to Charlie.  At the same time, the idea that a nice home, money for private school, and a dream to charter fish make sending Charlie to daycare our personal choice disgusts some people.

I realize that you can't please everyone, but what I don't understand is why we are even put in the position to worry about it. 

Since Jason and I are currently content with our situation, money is going into savings and Charlie loves his new daycare, this issue has been on the back burner for us, but a recent discussion with a friend of mine brought it right up front again.

This friend is an amazing mother who battled through tragedy and loss to bring her precious daughter into the world.  She and her husband adore their little girl and want only the best for her -- like all good parents.  Right now my friend is  facing an exciting career opportunity, but when I spoke with her she was almost in tears due to the unsolicited opinions and pressure from people around her.  The ironic thing is that just this week another girlfriend of mine was given the opportunity to fulfill her longtime dream of staying home, but she too is facing doubts due to comments from others. 

In my opinion all of these "well-meaning" advisers need to shut their mouths and take a look at their motivation.  I believe that if they searched their hearts they would find that their overwhelming need to persuade others is based on misgivings concerning their own decisions. 

Perhaps they work outside the home (or did so when their children were small) and feel like they are missing out or putting material possessions ahead of their family.  Perhaps they stay at home (or did way back when) and worry that they will have nothing to contribute to society when their children become independent.  Maybe they just hate their jobs or feel guilty for not enjoying play group.  I don't know what all the reasons may be, but I am confident that most of these people are driven by the need to justify their own choices and situations rather than an innate knowledge of what is best for another family.

Now, all families with two parents working outside of the home must find safe, reliable childcare and should definitely strive to spend as much time as possible playing and laughing and loving with their kids.  Just as all stay at home moms need to seek out social and creative opportunities for their children so they can develop friendships and a respect for structure and non-parental authority.  And obviously, should anyone have reason to believe that a child is being abused or neglected, he or she should step in to offer assistance or possibly even bring in the authorities.  Otherwise, isn't it the role of relatives, friends and neighbors to support each other?

Now, how do I justify such a resolute opinion on the subject, when I'm criticising others for their firm stances?  Proverbs 31:10-31. 

Here God outlines the responsibilities, attributes and character of a wise woman.  She does what it takes, whether it be in the home (vv. 15, 18-19) or out of the home (vv. 16, 24), to provide for her husband, her children and the needy.

She does not offer up unsolicited, mean-spirited advice to others, but "opens her mouth in wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue" (v. 27).  Because of this, she is blessed by her husband and her children (vv. 28 - 29) and to God, "her worth is far above jewels" (v. 10).

Charlie rocking his first tattoo!

(if that's not a situation begging for "advice", I don't know what is!)

Lost and Found

Toys...we have bins and toyboxes and shelves full of toys.  We rack our brains at Christmas and birthdays to figure out exactly what a 9 month old, 12 month old, etc will enjoy.   We cut off tags, scrub, disinfect, put together, equip with batteries.... and what does Charlie play with?  Anything that isn't a toy!

Last week he lugged my huge stock pot into the living room and climbed right in.  Later he dragged one of Jason's closet shelves from our bathroom into his bedroom and tried to use it as stepstool to play with his favorite toy of all -- the shutters. 

We actually have an ongoing game in our house called "Remote Control Keep Away".  Charlie is obsessed with the remote control.  Thinking we were oh-so-smart, Jason and I removed the batteries from two old CD/DVD player remotes and gave him his very own.  He has zero interest in these.  Instead, he devises ways to get the "real" remotes out of hiding.  Charlie is not above sweetly demanding a hug, so he can reach behind me and grab the remote from the back of the couch!

Even better, since he as the endless runny nose of a daycare kid (guilt! guilt!), Charlie is becoming very familiar with tissues and is actually quite the adept little nose blower.  In the playroom I keep the tissue box up on the high bookshelf, to avoid replacing it twice a day -- both Charlie and Otis find emptying the tissue box to be an extremely fulfilling activiity. 

Well, on Friday we were upstairs playing when Charlie walked over to the bookshelf, stretched out his arm and blew air out of his nose.  Proud that my son was smart enough to tell me when he wanted to blow his nose, I hopped up off the bean bag, walked over and pulled out a tissue.  I turned around just in time to catch Charlie racing across the room, giggling maniacally and diving onto the bean bag to pull the remote out from under the blanket where I hide it.  I truly think it may have been the proudest moment of his almost 16 months!

Now, while he can definitely cause some damage when he gets a hold of the remote, Daddy can always restore the picture, sound, etc when he comes home.  Apparently understanding this, Charlie has moved on to antics with more permanent results.

One morning Charlie was walking around the second floor "talking" on the baby monitor -- anything can be a phone in his world.  Suddenly he decided he wanted to wear Daddy's watch instead, and Jason noticed the monitor was nowhere in sight.  Assuming it would turn up in the dog bed or laundry basket, Jason handed over his watch and continued to get ready.  A couple minutes later, Jason walked into Charlie's room and found Charlie with his hand in the diaper pail!  Thinking he was stuck, Jason rushed over to help, only to find his watch clutched tightly in Charlie's hand.  Putting it all together and risking permanent damage to his nose, flipped down the flap, peered in and pulled out the baby monitor.

Luckily, our pail has a locking mechanism that we now use religiously, but that wasn't the case with our former kitchen trash can -- so we have a brand new one from Sam's that you have to push down on to open.  After finding spoons (don't all 15 month olds stir the trash?) , Daddy's work papers and a variety of other things in the trash, we took action.  I figure we have at least 2 to 3 days before Charlie figures out how to open this one.

The best find actually happened in Miami, though.  Jason flew down for vendor meeting a few weeks ago.  As he was unpacking his computer, he pulled out the missing dog from Charlie's farm puzzle.  I can only imagine what everyone in the meeting thought.  The hen actually showed up Saturday, behind the DVDs when I was dusting.  The sheep is still missing, but I predict that I'll run across it while cleaning out the freezer, making the bed or folding laundry... life is full of surprises!

Charlie soup

If one pair makes me cool...

[Sigh]

Scene 1: Mom and Charlie are "trotting to town" on the couch around 8:25 AM

"Da-da?" Charlie asks.
"Daddy's at work," Mom replies, "just like you get to go to school today."
[Gasp] Charlie grins, wriggles out of Mom's lap and and runs to the back door...

Scene 2: Toybox Daycare around 8:45 AM

Mom walks into the classroom with Charlie and starts to hang his bag on his hook.  Charlie starts waving goodbye ferociously.  Mom sets Charlie down on the ground.  Charlie grins and wanders off.

Mom says a couple of quick words to Miss Amanda.  Charlie walks up and commences waving until he is certain that mom is leaving.

Scene 3: The Yukon around 8:47 AM

"Wow, that was quick," Mom thinks.  [Double Sigh]

Epilogue: Daycare around 3:30 PM

Mom peers in the window and sees Charlie and his friends making the wheels on the bus go round and round.  She walks into the room and Charlie immediately starts waving goodbye to his teachers and reaching for mom.  All is right with the world.

Week 2; Day 1

Today started out horribly.  Charlie was in a bad mood from the moment I got him out of his crib.  This was in part due to a topple head-first into the crib itself, but I think there was more to it.  Anyway, breakfast was an absolute nightmare.  Charlie is at the stage where he insists on feeding himself, or refuses to eat.  Needless to say, my formerly clean jeans are now covered in oatmeal spots...but they're still going to have to make it through the day.  I absolutely refuse to go through a pair of jeans before 8 AM!

Playtime wasn't much better.  Everything seemed to frustrate him.  He wanted up, then he wanted down.  He wanted the sunglasses on him, then he wanted them on me, then he wanted them on the floor.  And this entire saga was accompanied by his newly acquired penchant for squealing and whining...ugghhh...

By the time Jason came downstairs, I was convinced that there was no way Charlie could go to daycare today.  He was just having too rough of a morning to make it until 12:00 for a nap.  Plus, how could I inflict this on his teachers?  But, it's Monday, a work day and I have Access Line reports and porting reports and market assessments waiting...

As much as I'd like to blame daycare for this morning's attitude, I thing Jason and I might actually be the culprits.  We definitely didn't provide a relaxing, laid back weekend for Charlie to recover from his first week of school. 

We kicked off Friday night with a blueberry pancake dinner.  On Saturday, Charlie had a playdate at Sophia's while Mom and Dad went to a cooking class for Corrisa's birthday.  Charlie took a great nap and had a blast playing the sandbox with Sophia.  So far they still seem to play independently, side-by-side, but we're really looking forward to watching their friendship grow!

After the birthday party we all headed over to Lakely's house for her first birthday party, where Charlie flirted, climbed, laughed and devoured a hamburger and a cupcake.  Next stop was Corrisa's house for her birthday party -- and more cake!  Charlie and I came home around 8:30, and he was beyond beat.

Sunday was lower key, but still fun.  After church, Charlie and I surprised Dad with lunch at the Boathouse on IOP, overlooking the marsh.  He even had is own cup of orange juice!  By the time we got home, all Jason and I wanted to do was take a nap...so the three of us just spent the rest of the day playing and watching golf. 

Add the weekend's adventures to the remnants of last week's cold and it's no wonder that Charlie was fussy this morning, and I can't in good conscience blame any deep-seated hatred of daycare, no matter how hard I try.  Especially since he didn't even cry when I dropped him off today.  I suppose I'll eventually be relieved to drop him off on fussy days, but right now I just feel guilty. 

Plus, on top of everything else, I forgot that today is picture day, so Charlie is sporting a dumptruck playsuit -- not exactly "picture day" attire...and his spare outfit is a Bass Pro onesie.  Looks like we definitely won't be ordering any pictures this go-round!

Family pic in pink princess birthday hats

Happy Birthday, Princess Lakely!

Mmmm...OJ

Where's Charlie?

If I could just get through the glass, I'm sure I could fly!

I can do it myself!

The perfect accessory for Monday morning drama

Day 3: Daycare Etiquette??

Technically today should have been Day 4, but Charlie played hookie yesterday to spend my birthday with me and Jason at the beach.  We had an absolutely fabulous time.  It was nice and cloudy, so the beach was comfortable and not too crowded.  After playing in the waves and enjoying my first sand birthday cake, we had lunch at Poe's (yummy!) and dessert downtown at Kaminsky's.  Then, after Charlie collapsed around 6:45, we finished off the day testing out my new margarita/smoothie machine with the neighbors!  It was absolutely perfect.

Back to reality this morning, though.  I dropped Charlie off at about 8:45, right as his class was lining up for Outside Time, and I think this was a major mistake.  Not only did he get upset and start crying, but I think it's very disruptive to the rest of the class to have us come in then.  I'm going to try leaving the house a few minutes later, so hopefully we'll arrive after they get outside.  I think Charlie will be more excited to stay, and we'll be less likely to cause a commotion for the teachers to try to resolve.

The whole experience made me realize that I don't really know the "rules" of daycare.  I have a lot of questions, but I'm not sure who to ask.  Each morning when I drop off and afternoon when I pick up, I feel like I'm disrupting the flow of the class.  The teachers don't do/say anything to make me feel this way, but they are understandably distracted, which makes it hard for me to feel comfortable asking questions.  Is it rude of us to arrive and leave at off times?  Maybe, but I'm not going to drop Charlie off an hour earlier and pick him up an hour later...so what do I do?

Other questions I have:

• I still can't remember the afternoon teachers' names.  Do I ask again?  Wouldn't that be completely rude to admit that I am oblivious to who is taking care of my baby?
• I send a sippy cup of water and an empty sippy cup for his milk at lunch.  Milk is on the menu, so I'm sure they provide it...but should I send the first cup with milk in it already?
• Do I have to call in absences if we're not taking Charlie on a random day due to sickness or family in town, etc?
• They don't provide a snack menu.  Would it be rude to ask what they serve for snack each day and how much he's eating?
• What will be worse -- if he's the biter or the bitee?  I feel certain that the issue will arise, and it would be horrifying for him to come home with bite marks...but won't it be worse to find out he's biting other kids and I'm not there to do anything about it?
• How long is too long to stand outside the picture window and spy on him when I go to pick him up?  I don't want the teachers to feel like I'm a stalker, but I like seeing how he interacts.
• Kate & Sophia's daycare takes lots of pictures of the kids and has an individual snapfish account for each that the parents can access online.  How long do I wait before suggesting this to Toy Box?  Do I make an anonymous suggestion or walk into the director's office and bring it up?
• Am I crazy to be waiting for them to tell me that Charlie is their favorite?  (ok...I know the answer to this one, but in all honesty, I keep expecting it.  How could he not be!?!?)

I realize that I should just bring up these issues when I'm there, but I feel like I should already know.  Plus, I feel like the teachers have more important things to do than play 20 questions with a neurotic mom.

If this kind of stuff just gets worse as kids get older, it's glaringly obvious why most teenagers hate their moms.  I'm going to be a huge embarrassment to Charlie by the time he's a freshman...

Bet you can't find my toes!

It takes dedication to maintain this phsyique!

Hmmmm...Chocolate Cake or Snickerdoodle cake...? Both!

32 years of birthday wishes come true