Best of Impressions

One of the biggest unknowns when we moved to West Ashley was finding a new church.  Leaving our old church in Summerville was very hard -- we love it and the people (in fact Charlie and I still attend the Ladies Bible Study), but we knew it would be important to find a church and church family much closer to our new home.

As we plan to send Charlie to James Island Christian School next year, our first stop was James Island Christian Church.  It's not the closest to our house, but still less than 15 minutes -- plus we would love for Charlie to have a real feeling of community and closeness to church family since all of our "real family" is so far.

Being me, I was fairly sure we wouldn't like it.  First, I'm incredibly picky about churches and second, it would just be too great to love the school and church equally (impressive faith, huh?). 

Well thankfully (and surprisingly) we love JICC.  The pastors are passionate about teaching the Bible and serving God and the people are very friendly.  Therein lies the one challenge though -- there are lots and lots and lots of people.  JICC is easily five time bigger than either Grace Christian Fellowship or Beth Haven.

Determined to overcome my natural anti-social behavior and meet the moms of all these kids Charlie is falling in love with in children's church, I decided to attend the ladies Christmas party Monday evening (with much encouragement from Jason). 

Since I didn't work myself up to commit to it until Monday morning, I hadn't planned my finger food or bought an ornament yet.  Thankfully we still had plenty of homemade Christmas sugar cookies, so I picked out the prettiest of those and did my best to "artfully" arrange them on a paper plate.  I waivered back and forth on the ornament, leaning towards just sitting out of the game -- but I am really trying hard to step up and be social, so I did what any forgetful mom on a budget would do: I found the prettiest, non-sentimental ornament on our tree and wrapped it up.  What could go wrong, right?

Well, apparently any social graces fail me when I leave the house without Jason or Charlie, because I managed to launch the plate of cookies across the driveway while getting in the car -- and I don't even have a four year old or groceries or ice to blame...sigh...  Amazingly the Ziploc baggie seemed to protect them, so rather than venture back in the house, I soldiered on.

I then found myself driving aimlessly through Parrot Bluff rather than Parrot Point, so I was saved from an uncomfortably early arrival, and when I did arrive I was able to tuck my cookies into the dessert table without anyone noticing and silently vow to avoid that room for the rest of the night.

I quickly found a cup of water to give me something to do with my hands, wandered aimlessly a bit to appear less awkward (brilliantly successful, I'm sure...as I more or less paced up and down a hallway).  Finally, I found a friendly looking lady near the back door and worked myself up to start a conversation.  Turns out Sherry is a lovely lady who knows almost everyone, and even introduced me to one of the key coordinators of mom events -- her daughter-in-law!  Yay!

Next I had a friendly chat with the pastor's wife in the buffet line then enjoyed the meal with Margaret, another lovely woman who assured me I don't need to -- nor will I ever -- know everyone.  I just need to find my niche.  I just adore practical advice.

Sounds like a successful evening, right?  Well, here is where that ornament comes back in... As all of the ladies gathered in the living room for the exchange and I tried to get an unobtrusive spot, I heard the hostess' daughter announce the rules..."when someone selects your ornament, you step forward and explain why you chose that one to bring..." 

What!?!?!  When does that ever happen????  The one time I regift in my life I have to own up to it immediately?!?!?!?  Uggghhh....

I contemplated just announcing that I'd brought it because it was "pretty", like many of the other women -- a true fact, then remembered that I'd confided in Leah, standing next to me that I had taken it off my tree when she admitted she wasn't participating because her husband had suggested she do the same and she refused.  Why do I have such a big mouth????

After a few rounds, a lady chose the gift bag with two Boston Terriers in Santa hats (classy, huh?) and the spotlight was on me...  I walked forward, unsure of what I would say and told the truth.  Everyone laughed kindly and to my defense, it is a really pretty ornament...but this is definitely not how I intended to start building relationships... 

It could have been any social situation I attended in 1993...at this point I'm just grateful four volcanic pimples didn't appear on my chin and my hair didn't spontaneously kink into a perm... 

Praise God that I have a socially adept husband and son to tag along with most of the time!

Ho,ho, ho!

It's no secret that we're a bit ambivalent about Santa in our house.  Don't get me wrong, we have nothing against the jolly old elf, we just classify him in a group with Frosty and the Grinch and leave the spotlight for Jesus.

 

No doubt some find it Scrooge-like, but I am proof-positive that Charlie can grow up loving Christmas even if he is a bit cynical about the man in red.  Don't worry -- I assure you that we are working on making sure he keeps his mouth shut better than his Mama did back in 1984 (a very belated apology to Ms. Jenks' second grade class -- though I have to say I still struggle with the idea of "good lies and bad lies").

 

Needless to say, Jason and I haven't put a bunch of effort into Santa in our house and up until this year it's always been a non-issue.  Each year we watch the Claymation movie, we hang him on our tree and watch glitter float around him in the snow globe then we go sit on his lap for a seasonal photo-op. 

 

But this year Charlie is starting to ask questions -- primarily about why so many adults are so concerned with what he is going to ask this stranger to bring him on Christmas.  Having vowed not to lie to him, I am trying to tread lightly and regularly falling back on my mother's privilege of just changing the subject and/or turning the question into a "well, what do you think?" moment... 

 

But let's face it, he's a smart kid who knows his mother well -- not to mention the fact that he seems to have a very similar desire to believe in realistic fairy tales.  The kid is totally on to me, but still likes to play along.  Our 2013 visit to Santa left little doubt to that. 

 

After a number of skeptical conversations through the day on Tuesday, Charlie dressed himself in his "most handsome" clothes, gamely jumped up on Santa's lap, held his smile while we waited for the dogs to look in the general direction of the camera, then requested the one gift he new would be a sure thing... a surprise.

 

I really love this kid.

 

 

Artistic Surprise

Ever since I started to sporadically attend happy hour/painting classes with girlfriends a couple years ago, Charlie has wanted to go.  After my last evening out, I decided it was time to surprise him, so I booked him at a children's class. 

All I told him was that I had a surprise for him and he had to wear clothes that could get dirty (this is the only way to prevent him wearing ties and sportscoats...).  And here he is, ready to get dirty...

En route to the surprise he tried to wheedle it out of me...

Mommy:  Are you excited about your surprise?
Charlie: Yes!  Will you tell me what it is?
Mommy: Nope.
Charlie: I think it's maybe the dollar store?
Mommy: Nope.  Better than the dollar store...
Charlie: Awwww....I don't think anything could be better than the dollar store except maybe heaven.
Mommy: It is.  I promise.
Charlie: Is it the outlet mall?
Mommy: Nope.  Even better.
Charlie: Better than the dollar store and the outlet mall?!  Is it heaven?!
Mommy: No...not that good...but still good...


When we arrived at the shop, though, it turns out we were the only people to show up.  Sarah, the owner, must have taken pity on me though when she saw my stricken face, because she went ahead and gave Charlie a one-on-one session -- after he had rousing conversation about mutton busting with her marketing representative.  It really is just fun to go places with this little man.

As the pictures prove, Charlie thankfully inherited his Daddy's and Grandma's artistic skills...in fact, while all my paintings are relegated to my closet, we're planning to hang his in the playroom.  And he's already decided that he's going to painting summer camp.  Let the fun begin!

My dear sweet boy,

You continue to amaze, impress and delight me, and there are days when I truly couldn't be more proud of you.

Of course...there are also days when I feel like I must be doing everything wrong, but I'm starting to see that if we can push through those struggles, the other side is amazing.

As you may or may not remember by the time you read this, you skipped preschool.  Basically, I really just wanted one more year with you before the demands and restrictions of school interfered, so knowing that you had learned so much during your years at daycare, Daddy and I kept you home. 

Convinced that we were doing the best thing, I was still a bit concerned that you might feel "behind" when you start kindergarten next year, and it is very important to me that you get the best start possible to your school career because I want you to continue to love to learn.  So, based on a random recommendation from a friend, I decided to teach you to read this fall -- after all, if you can read, you can learn anything. 

More importantly, as we've slogged through the lessons I've realized that the ability to read will offer you infinitely more than confidence in kindergarten.  This will sound a bit melodramatic, but I now feel like if anything happens to me before you're a grown man, I have helped you to learn the most important skill possible -- the ability to get to know God and His will for you through His Word.

It has been a very bumpy road.  We've had some amazing ups -- like when you read your first book or your first billboard, but many serious downs...crying, throwing, screaming, telling me you hate me and the book, telling me I'm the worst mom ever, losing all your shows for days on end...  Basically, I'm not the best teacher in the world and you do not like to be told what to do -- it's been interesting.

But today it was all worth it.  We were about half way through the sentences on lesson 86 (only 14 more to go!!!!), when you looked up, wide-eyed and said, "Mommy, I am so glad you bought me this book!"

Charlie, I cannot tell you how much that means to me.  As your mom, I am sure that I am inferring much more than your four year old little heart could have meant, but I heard that you realize that hard work begets success, that you recognize that Mommy & Daddy want what is best for you and will make you work for it, that you see that everything I do for you I do out of tremendous love and that you understand the importance of gratitude. 

You will likely never remember today or possibly even that we learned to read together...but please know that I couldn't be more pleased with the little boy you are or more grateful for the blessing of you.

Love,
Mommy